Time

Another entry, i think i really AM getting bored now. It's a mixture of fustration, and sometimes just thinking and reflecting too much. Too much time can be a curse.

Been thinking about time. I'm 24 now, and being a slightly practical person, i have all these plans til i'm 30. ANd i hope i stick to them, as they are definitely duable. But you know what i hate? Is the race against our age, to have to DO so much before this age, and be thinking about MARRIAGE before that age.

Would like to think that time is on my side, but then everything has a limit and it's this age clock that pushes people to do things. The scarry thing is i really count on time so much, the ONE thing i count on in fact. If time was a person, i'd trust that person the most. I assume i'd have a long life, and so much of time that i can chill and do everything slowly without pressure.

Once in a while though, you get fustrated because a little chunk of 'taught' reality creeps in, and you think. Ohh no, time, i'm wasting it. each week, each month, doing ...NOTHING, well something really, but nothing that COUNTS....in the eyes of society. So, are you wasting that time then? It sucks that everything has to counted to be noticed as you DOING stuff. Doing nothing is just as important, because you can't think if you're always doing something. Need to clear your head sometime, and build character.

That's all. I really dislike updating blogs actually, because i still think they're a little lame, but another curse...i really want to write what i feel down. But i'm so affected that i feel like writing without people reading them does not ACCOUNT for anything really. It's one of those...doing stuff but not REALLY doing stuff because no-one ever knows about it dilemas. I wish i could be just personal and not think of things this way, but i think i can't really help it. It's embedded in me somehow. Thus, i dislike it.